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Simply wished to pop in and say I’ve actually been actually having fun with MXiPr. It is helped me an incredible quantity with my social nervousness and it actually seems like a healthful chem. For me it is like a mixture between nitrous, MDMA, Ketamine and Shrooms/LSD…sounds ridiculous and do not go into it anticipating it to copy any of those substances nevertheless it’s prefer it takes a bit of bit from every relying on the purpose within the expertise you’re at.
It is actually improved my high quality of life and has helped me be capable to look individuals within the eye and have real optimistic conversations. I’ve recieved extra profit from it than I’ve from ketamine, and I do not get a nasty hangover suicide tuesday feeling like I do from MDMA.
I have been that means to make this publish for awhile after having seen the publish about somebody recieving seizures from 80mg IM and whereas I do really feel for that particular person I do not suppose its honest to say the chemical is to be written off. I’ve consumed over a pair grams of it now up to now couple months, I’ve acquired a fairly addictive persona however since I’ve switched to MXiPr as my DOC I’ve no want to make use of opiates or drink booze. I’ve additionally had no seizures and I exploit plenty of these items at a time, not going to listing dosages as my tolly is excessive.
I used to be ingesting loads earlier than and continually performing like an fool and dropping my shit (actually and metaphorically) however since utilizing MXiPr I’ve grow to be much more social, compassionate and have even been capable of mend some bridges i’ve burned with coworkers.
It is also helped me settle for myself for the flawed particular person I’m and I am studying to not hate myself for the ideas I’ve as I do not actually have management over them to a sure diploma they kinda simply pop up like hiccups heh. I am feeling the love of life and the easy issues, all ladies are so engaging and I am noticing I am being pleasant with individuals considering they’re another person however as they get nearer I understand its a stranger however since I used to be smiling they’re smiling again lol.
I’m a bit of anxious I’ll grow to be hooked on this substance as I’ve had substance abuse points up to now, however for the primary time in my life I am really going out and having a want for human connection and making mates. I would moderately be abusing dissos than heroin or stims and my ADHD has all however been obliterated since a extremely optimistic 5-Meo-MiPt journey the place I actually felt unity and love.
Anyway, rambling over…simply wished to say my 2cents bout this excellent chemical.
After enthusiastic about my scenario some extra I understand I’ve very black or white considering at occasions and I worry I’ll have grow to be hooked on this chem on account of its seemless countless optimistic results for me with obvious lack of any actual tangible negatives.
This can’t be true although, we will not reside in a one season world and a coin would not be a coin with out the back and front. There isn’t any level in simply sustaining a state of bliss, one in all as of late I will should be taught to let go and to belief “the opposite” the dreaded “not me” the nervousness.
I simply have a lot nervousness on a regular basis, I really feel like a quivering mess of nerve endings continually vibrating and in a everlasting state of flip flopping wobbilyness, and I do not know what to do. Medicine assist, for a bit…I’ve by no means been one to abuse pychedelics however all the time was fasincated with their results on my thoughts and I really feel their use has helped me combine my thoughts and physique when earlier than I used to be a disembodied no person, a literal no-body only a pair of floating eyes in a pores and skin encapsulated ego.
However the introspection and physique load can usually be at occasions torturous and once I love I fear about being engulfed wholy in it and dropping myself, and feeling as if my “self” the factor between my eyes is being torn and teared aside which is felt as bodily painful on my physique whereas additionally giving me horrible nausea and what not. So when a dissioative psychedelic got here round like MXiPr I immediality fell in love.
“Wow wEE” I assumed, this shits identical to a mixture between molly, whippits, and brought orally it seems like I am coming down from a extremely good LSD/Mushrooms journey in the long run with some tremendous cozy serotonin vibes, compassion and a simotaneous state of each lack of worry from the painful scrunity of the gazes of others and a whole understanding and acceptance of others for who and what they’re.
I might share a smoke with a crying homeless ladies I met so way back who would inform me all about her abusive BF who kicked her out of her dwelling and never really feel the necessity to go any judgement, like fuck we might not have the identical previous however I do know all of us have had a previous and everybody was at one level just a bit scared weak little woman or boy, full of affection and unaldertrated pleasure for the world earlier than one thing or somebody damage us and we discovered to shut ourselves off to others.
To cite my favorite film, [Synecdoche – New York by Charlie Kaufman](https://youtu.be/Z9PzSNy3xj0)
“Abd the reality is, I really feel so fucking offended and the reality is, I simply so really feel so fucking unhappy And I’ve felt damage for therefore fucking lengthy, and for simply as lengthy i have been pretending I am okay, simply to get alongside, only for… I do not know why.
Possibly as a result of nobody needs to listen to about my distress, as a result of they’ve their very own, effectively fuck all people…Amen”
Fuck you all, and I really like each single one in all you.
I have been sitting on 1 / 4 gram bag of 5-Meo-DMT I’ve actually wished to attempt however have up to now been too frightened to. I do not know what I am so afraid about as I’ve already used so many various substances earlier than. It is not likely the ego loss of life half I worry for, its the potential of respectable loss of life in case I aphyxiate alone vomit since I’ve nobody who might journey sit for me.
I’ve heard that about 80% of people that’ve tried 5-meo-DMT have had optimistic useful lasting life altering experiences lasting many weeks and even months generally a lifetime.
I wish to be liked, I wish to wish to reside. Life is valuable and I wish to consider it once I say it.